Friday, January 15, 2016


I've talked about my body issues on the blog before and my desire to fix them. I've claimed many a time since packing on the poundage after my diagnosis (and subsequent medication, which caused the weight gain) that I'm going to lose the weight. I'm going to get fit (and have fun! Body Break. Anyone? Bueller?).

How many times have I said this? At the very least 10. How many times have I given up/failed/not even started? At the very least 10.

So what's so different this time? January begs the question: "Is this going to be another failed New Year's resolution?" No. My answer is a hard and firm no. Because this time, I have more of a reason than "I don't want to be fat". This isn't a weight loss. This is a lifestyle change. I'm saying goodbye to the scale. I'm saying goodbye to tracking the pounds. I'm saying goodbye to setting myself up for failure. I'm saying goodbye to an unhealthy lifestyle.

Really, what's different? I have real reasons. Ones that don't revolve around "so I can be thin" or "he won't love me if I'm fat."

1) My dad. After my dad was diagnosed with cancer, it really struck me hard. I quit smoking, I started going for daily walks, I quit eating fast food 4 times a week. Because the biggest thing I took from that is I want to be healthy for him. Because he doesn't need to worry about my health while going through such a shaky period with his. And because I want to reduce my risk for having to go through the same thing. I want to be better for him.

2) Working for a sports organization. I work in a sport building. There's nothing quite like being surrounded by fit and happy people every day. See what I emphasized there? Happy. It's amazing how happy the majority of people in this building are, and I KNOW endorphins have something to do with that. If that's not inspiring I don't know what is.

3) Realistic expectations. At almost 26, I'm finally over comparing my body to everyone else's. Everyone has different genes, different metabolism, different bodies. No two women are the same. I will never not have curves, I will never fit a size 2. AND THAT'S OKAY! I'm more worried about feeling good than looking good. This is about me, not everyone else or their expectations. I want to be fitter so I can be happy, healthy, and around for a long time.

4) Support system. I have people on this journey with me. I'm not going it alone. I have friends who have my back, who go to the gym with me, who support me and remind me that no matter what, I'm beautiful. Also, it's a lot harder to bail on the gym when you have two people harassing you not to quit. I'm also very lucky that my coworkers are also mega supportive. (Again, sports organization, all about being healthy and happy.) Two amazing women I work with are also all about that #fitgirllife. It's great to come in and talk about our struggles, our successes, and our progress. Also knowing I'm not the only person whose muscles are screaming bloody murder at them in the office is nice.

5) I'm doing it for me. There are zero outside influences for once. No shitty boyfriend telling me I'm fat. I'm not doing this for validation from a man. I'm doing this for validation from myself. I'm ready to love myself fully. While I've come along way on my self-love path, and think I'm awesome inside, I want to feel awesome on the outside. I want to feel comfortable in my clothes. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin. It's only been a week since I really began this journey, and I already feel better. It's amazing what proper nutrition, a little exercise, and a good night's sleep can do for your mentality.

So if any of you reading this are on a similar journey, or need a little reminder of how great you are, hit me up. I will support you if you need, I will remind you that you are beautiful, and if I can do this, so can you!


  1. In it together for a healthy life forever. You know how much I love sweaty selfies, please share some of yours with me and I'll do the same. Love you and everything about your decisions to be a healthier and happier you.

  2. Ohhhhh Jessi and her sweaty selfies.

    I love you and I'm so proud of you! Do it for you, that's what I need to tell myself. I wish my friends and I had the same schedule so we could work out together, but that's life. But feel free to schedule a skype date with me so if I haven't worked out or did eat crap all day, you can yell at me.

  3. way to choose positive reasons girl! I still so often struggle with comparisons, so it's nice to hear of light on the other side of the tunnel. let's be fitness friends? xo.
    Robin |

  4. I love this, friend! I am throwing myself into the "get fit" ring with you. It took me a long time to stop comparing myself with others & when I did, I found myself meeting my goals and much happier because I was doing it all for myself. Now with the pregnancy over, I find that I'm trying to keep myself from thinking how others look once more so that I can get back to my healthy lifestyle for ME. Thanks for this amazing post, lovebug! xx

  5. I'm so proud of you, and I KNOW you got this! It really is amazing how a simple 60-minute workout can change your entire perspective on the day. xo