Tuesday, May 5, 2015

That Time I Was Forgettable

Hello lovelies. I hope everyone had a nice weekend! It's finally starting to look like summer here in Winnipeg and so in celebration I've finally shaved my legs. Also, it's more so I can wear dresses to work and not get sweaty and not cause I really wanted to. 

But alas, the reason I've gathered you all here today is not to discuss my awful personal grooming habits. No. We are here today for a story; another installment of "Story Time with Melissa".

I don't know how much I really wrote about my time as a single gal last winter. I can't recall which date stories I told, and which ones I left off of here out of sheer embarrassment. So if you've heard this one I will apologize now, but a little refresher. 

Last February I went on a date with a guy and had my friends sit in a corner and creep on said date for fear that I might get raped and/or murdered. Look... I know I need help. I really need to lay off the Criminal Minds, but we had met online so sue me for being cautious...
 
 
Well anyway, I thought it would be funny to tell him after awhile that they were there and he obviously thought I was ridiculous. So we decide to go bowling, but the lanes are really busy so he suggests we just go back to his place to watch a movie. What do I do? Ask for his address and text it to no lewss than 4 friends and request they call me if they have not heard from me by midnight. Strike 2? 

He's fairly nice, we go to his place, he lets me pick a movie and I choose Taken 2. Not a smart move choosing a kidnap movie considering my psychotic brain. Whatever, we watch the movie, I sit on the opposite end of the couch and sweat profusely cause I'm so nervous and then I leave before 11 pm. Safe to say I never hear from him again. I was giant, awkward, sweaty weirdo who accused him of being a serial killer. Not surprised. It might have been my biggest regret in the last year that I couldn't act like a normal human being. 

Fast forward to this weekend and I was at a social and lo and behold who is the first person I spy? Yup. So I avoided him like the plague cuase I was so embarrassed of myself. But then later in the night I got the courage to message him and ask if he was in fact there. To which he replies yes. And then two days later he adds me to Facebook through an act of creeping that impressed the hell out of me and we talk and it's great... and then I realize he doesn't remember our date. 
 
 
I'm not lying. He. Does. Not. Remember. How do these things happen to me? I swear to god I felt like I was in an episode of Seinfeld! 
 
But then a bright light shone down on me and I realized this was my second chance! So I need you all to hope for me. I need this redemption! He's so hot. I'm getting this second date. And I'm NOT going to be a giant weirdo this time.

The End.


10 comments

  1. Melissa Wins!!!! Or Loses? Hey at least you shaved your legs!

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  2. Yay for second chances and silky smooth legs!

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  3. Wow that is crazy but yay for a second chance! :)

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  4. Good luck!!!! I hope it all goes smoothly, with as little awkwardness as possible!

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  5. AND THE LORD SAID "LET MELISSA BE BLESSED WITH HIS FINE ASS, AGAIN!"

    Pretty sure that's almost good enough to be an actual verse.
    Good luck, lady love!

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  6. That is so cray! Did he think you just randomly messaged him to ask if he was there? Either way, have fun on the man hunt!

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  7. Your dating habits and my dating habits would be friends. Yaaass get that second (first?) date!

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  8. He doesn't remember???? LOL! Good luck with your second chance :) I am sure you will be more at ease and at least you know his full name and your friends could probably describe him to a sketch artist.

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  9. What?! He has to remember. How does he think you got his number? He must know you've met somehow...

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  10. Hahahahah! I love that your friends were lurking in the background!

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