Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Vent Session: Adulting

There was a lot I wanted to do on Saturday and didn't get around to doing it. Like going to American Hustle by myself. Which I was really looking forward to. Why didn't I go? Oh maybe because I slept until 1:30 pm. Get your shit together Melissa that's not cool. So I wake up entirely too late which makes no sense because I went to bed at 11 pm on a Friday because I'm obviously the coolest cat around. Anyway, wake up angry at myself, go to make lunch and realize there's no food. Or juice which, let's be real, is the only thing I was actually looking forward to. 

So now I'm sad because I have to go grocery shopping but it's a Saturday so it's going to be crazy and I don't want to be around people. Then I pick up "Let's Pretend This Never Happened" because I also wanted to finish reading that and it was on my list of things to do. But then I forget to start my car to go grocery shopping and an hour later I go to the fridge to get juice (because I have the short term memory of a goldfish apparently) and clearly there isn't any so I cry because I just really want juice. And for some reason that reminds me that I have TWO LOADS of laundry in the washer/dryer from the night before that I forgot about. And then I remember that I'm supposed to shovel the driveway before it gets too cold to do so without risk of frostbite. So what did I do? I went to my mom's. And avoided it all. And ate delicious home made food and pretended I still lived there. 

All of this led to me having to suck it up on Sunday and go grocery shopping and now I have 5 jugs of juice and 18 juice boxes because clearly I never want to run out of juice again. But because I forgot to shovel the driveway, my car got stuck in the snow when I was leaving for work yesterday. Which led to another meltdown of course (shout out to the kind neighbor who shoveled out my tires, you're a god). And then I remembered I STILL hadn't taken out the laundry...

Living alone is hard y'all. 


  1. i go to bed every night at 930pm because i just can't stay awake any longer. then i get up at 430/5am because i'm an old hag. however, this does help with getting to the grocery store when it opens and i'm racing through the aisles beating all the 60yr olds and feeling like a champ. that's how i feel better about myself!

    oh and in toronto today, it's like, minus a million. fuck winter.

    Vodka and Soda

  2. should have gone and seen american hustle. i saw it yesterday, amy adams is the truth in that movie. also, gimmie all of the juice!

  3. American Hustle was amazing! You need to see it pronto! Also, do my laundry too plz? Kthnx.

  4. This is why I live in an apartment. Snow shoveling? Pfft. (Actually, I just can't afford a house yet.)

    Bulk. Buy everything in bulk. That's key.

  5. You are wonderful. Just thought you needed to hear that.

  6. Don't scare me about moving out! lol. Kidding. But yeah...adulting sucks. And I like that you call it that.