Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Dear Future...

This has been in my drafts for ages. But stupid Fallon wrote one pretty much the day I was going to. So I had to put mine on hold. UGH why are we the same person girl? Soulmates. ANYWAY. Here's an open letter to the future poor sucker who gets stuck with me. 

Dear Blank,

I promise to always make you French Toast on Sundays with my special recipe. And maybe I'll even bring it to you in bed. I will then, however, need the afternoon to laze on the couch watching hockey or football and you will probably have to join me. 

I won't Netflix cheat on you but I want you to know how hard that will be for me. I will also promise not to make you watch chick flicks with me if you promise not to make me watch war movies. But I will need you to man up and watch scary movies with me. A lot. 

I will give you lots of space because I will need lots of my own. Boys nights are strongly encouraged and I will always come and pick your drunk ass up. In return, I expect you to understand when I need to drink 3 liters of wine with my girls and be able to find something else to do. And then pick my drunk ass up. 

I will buy you cheesy gifts and think I'm really funny so you're going to have to pretend to like them. Also, please laugh at my jokes because I am really funny. I'm also sorry in advance for always thinking that I'm funny. 

You're going to have to make an effort to indulge my Harry Potter obsession or we're just not going to work. I'm going to make you marathon the movies with me and I will need no complaints. After that, we're cool. 

I promise to cook you lots of delicious food because that's the best way I know how to take care of you. So you might get fat. That might also be my secret way of making sure no other betches get you. I'm sneaky. 

I will hold your hand all. the. time. At the movies, in the car, at the grocery store. Everywhere. I need to keep you close. Same goes with cuddling. Always. 

I need you to understand my gypsy soul. Which means I'll need you to be my rock and my anchor. Otherwise, I may try and run away. But I want you on my adventures, so I need you to understand when I want to get in the car and just drive. You need to be okay with this. 

Good night texts are not required but are much appreciated from time to time. So are "just because" phone calls. E-mails at work too. 

You need to get along with my family. We are loud, obnoxious and so very close. If you don't make an effort to also be vulgar and ridiculous, you probably won't last long. 

Lastly, I promise to do my best to make sure you always feel loved. Whatever way I can. I'm weird, and distant, and sometimes get lost in my own head. So you might not realize I'm showing you affection or that I care. I promise to try and do or say one nice thing a day so you know that even when I'm lost, I'm still here. 


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  1. i love this! esp the part about getting along with your family because how can you separate the two, amirite?

    and yes 10000% to alone time away from your partner. i need my ME time and i'm sure he needs his own time!

    Vodka and Soda

  2. This post makes me all kinds of happy :) you spectacular girl, you! :) also... 3 litres of wine... when do we start? Now? Oh, alright then... I guess if we have to...

  3. Can I date you? I'd love french toast on Sunday's and someone cooking for me. I also need my space. This would work out perfect for me! Ktnx.

  4. So where do I sign up? I like french toast, I like 3 liters of wine.. Hahah, but seriously I love this! How freaking awesome would it be if later you read this and it all fit perfect with the guy you were dating. Perfection!

  5. Maybe you can share your French toast recipe with us sometime! Definitely one of my favourite weekend breakfasts. And I totally agree about indulging in the HP obsession - my husband learned this one pretty early on. haha. Great letter...your future ____ is really lucky!!!

  6. This is precious. Can i be your mate? I want french toast. I also enjoy getting boys cheesy gifts because I think I'm funny even though I'm not.

  7. This is super cute! I remember writing these sorts of letters to my future husband when I was in high school because they were always in Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul...I'm pretty confident what I wrote as a 16 year old would be drastically different from what I'd write today!

  8. you and your gypsy tears will be very happy with a manfriend someday! i will put big money on that. and you're funny, it is a given he will laugh at all your jokes.

  9. Yeeeaaahh... I'm still working on getting Derek to watch HP with me with no complaints.

  10. IF YOU'RE GOING TO CALL ME A NAME AT LEAST LINK MY NAME OKAY JESUS WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUUUUUUUU :) kidding. I love this, obvi. I was wondering when it was going to come to light. Cause like, we are legit the same person. Uh, I need this french toast in my life. And I LOLd when you said 3 liters of wine because I know it's true. I just love you. Gah.

    xo fal |

  11. Adorable idea for a post. You're going to make a man very happy someday!

  12. This is such a cute idea. Might be an idea I'll need to borrow for myself. I love french toast, now if only I could find someone to make it for me every week!